I read an article a while back, about how women who have children grow a 'mommy muscle'. The article was meant for new moms and was giving advice about how to acknowledge the hardships of dealing with a crying baby, lack of sleep, and all the worry of having the responsibility of a new little human being. There is no way one can prepare for all this, but with time and experience the 'mommy muscle' grows stronger and stronger making motherhood less overwhelming. I thought about my mommy muscle several times over the past week, and how it was getting a hardcore workout, while Bjarni was in Europe. I was crushing disgusting bugs (where I would otherwise have called on Bjarni), hurling car seats, laundry and trash up and down a lot of stairs, sitting with two kids, who wanted to be held at the same time. I called Jonas Thomas and I snapped at Silja more than a couple of times, because I was exhausted to the bone, but with that said it was surprisingly fun. We made trips to the park at 7am and ate donuts for breakfast, before the heat kicked in, we had movie nights with popcorn and cartoons, and we followed our to-do list as best possible. It was week with far less strictness than normally. We couldn't do everything I had planned, because Silja rolled out of our bed the day after Bjarni left, and broke her collarbone. Booh, and hello mommy muscle...
The day before he left, I went and bought a box of baby formula, thinking now I'm prepared for the worst: If something happens to Silja, and someone else has to look after Jonas, who is otherwise dependent on me in terms of eating, then this box will save us. Luckily it never got that bad, but when I saw a bump on her shoulder some miserable hours after the fall, and I went to ask our neighbor for help, I thought: here I am in this emergency situation, I have dreaded, which I have to deal with alone. I'm so thankful for our neighbors, and I don't know how I would have managed without. Our neighbor Chrissy took us to the health clinic, and a couple of X-rays and a whole lot of tears from both kids later, we knew the collarbone was broken, and she had to have her arm in a sling for the following three weeks. So she needed a little more help and care, and was only allowed quiet activities, which made it all a little more demanding but we managed.
We made a sensory box with beans, which kept her occupied for hours. WIN!!
Needless to say we were all very happy when Bjarni returned. I think I was like a balloon, who after a week of initiating fun projects and keeping calm, was running out of air. He's been good about giving space for me to regain strength since coming back, and now we are back to the good old normal.
Hurray for dads, who take care of most of the hurling up and down stairs and who deal with awful bugs, and who is there to step in when the toddler is having another meltdown, and hurray for my mommy muscle, who is as strong as ever.
